When i want something to be better than it’s today. When i want my body to feel better than it’s today. When i want my mind to feel better than it’s today. When i want my relationships to be better than they are today. Who should i go to? Sometimes we turn to our parents for better facilities, sometimes to our partners for better moments, sometimes kids for better behaviour, sometimes neighbours for better surroundings, sometimes colleagues for better performance, agree? When infact all these people can act only upto a physical level. Having to depend on others is loosing power over our lives. How we feel is independent of anything and anyone. We have the power to change the way we feel, the way our relationships are, the way our body is but we often do not turn to ourselves is because we do not even believe whether it’s me who can do it. This blog is about awakening our self that the more i am going to others the far i am going from solutions. Hence more complexity, more problems, more frustration and so on. I am the only person i should go to.
My thoughts and the way i feel. Every thought i create! Where does it influence, what is it’s effect, who does it reach? Ever wondered? Must have come across the phrase “what goes around comes around”. Simplest thought created radiates first to my mind then to my feelings then to my body eventually to my actions & then to the outside world. So you see whatever i think has utmost impact on me & my feelings.
We think our thoughts are based on the situations happening outside. For example the day things are going my way i feel happy, the day people are nice to me i feel respected, the day my kids listen to me i feel good, the day my partner takes me on dinner i feel loved and so on. We think it’s normal to feel this. So clearly the situations & the state of mind are inter connected. I want to question this usual notion. The situations are stimulus going on outside but response has to come from inside. So the response is independent of anything happening in front of me. This is emotional intelligence.
Emotional intelligence is knowing that i am allowed to choose the way i think, the way i respond & the way i feel irrespective of what’s going on. When we say it’s obvious to feel bad, get angry, get frustrated because the situation is certain we are actually giving away our power of control over our feelings,emotions,words & more. Here we witness the futility of trying to control people. Whereas emotional intelligence is knowing when to display and when to delay the emotions.
You can’t heal in the same environment that made you sick. So keep what’s outside outside & get in youself to have better reaction. Nobody can empower you better than yourself. Make your mind the place where you have everything nice & when you sit with your thoughts you bounce back happy & healed. Don’t choose the easy way out by blaming others for your feelings. Face the challenge of being calm whatever the circumstances be. Take charge & let nothing hamper your bliss. Today promise to try a change that be the stimulus as small or as big as u can imagine, you will choose the emotion rather than doing the so called obvious. Tell yourself, my mind is quite intelligent & it says “It’s ok, loosing my peace of mind is not worth it for them or the situation”. No dependence on others is actual power. I don’t need any apology, i don’t need others to change, i don’t need others to be polite in order to be at peace within myself. Happen what may sitting a while with myself will heal me & create a better me. This is Gunjan signing off. Love & Peace ✌